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Redneck dating etiquette

A cigarette lighter and a small tolerance for pain can accomplish the same goal and save hours.

Its a good idea to keep a bucket of water handy when using this method.

When decanting wine, make sure that you tilt the paper cup, and pour slowly so as not to "bruise" the fruit of the vine. If drinking directly from the bottle, always hold it with your fingers covering the label. While ears need to be cleaned regularly, this is a job that should be done in private using one's OWN truck keys. Proper use of toiletries can forestall bathing for several days. Let her know you're interested: "I've been wanting to go out with you since I read that stuff on the bathroom wall two years ago." 3.

- Redneck Personal Hygiene - *Unlike clothes and shoes, a toothbrush should never be a hand-me-down item.Though uncomfortable, say yes to socks and shoes for this special occasion.- Redneck Etiquette for All Occasions - *Never take a beer to a job interview or ask if they press charges. If you have to vacuum the bed, it is time to change the sheets. Even if you're certain that you are included in the will, it is still considered tacky to drive a U-Haul to the funeral home.Plucking unwanted nose hair is time-consuming work. Some will say PM; Others might say "Monday." If the latter is the answer, it is the man's responsibility to get her to school on time. Livestock, usually, is a poor choice for a wedding gift. Kissing the bride for more than 5 seconds may get you shot. Always identify people in your yard before shooting at them. However, if you live alone, deodorant is a waste of good money. Dirt and grease under the fingernails is a social no-no, as they tend to detract from a woman's jewelry and alter the taste of finger foods. Always offer to bait your date's hook, especially on the first date. Establish with her parents what time she is expected back. A leisure suit with a cummerbund and a clean bowling shirt can create a tacky appearance. Though uncomfortable, say "yes" to socks and shoes for this special occasion. Dim your headlights for approaching vehicles; Even if the gun is loaded, and the deer is in sight. When approaching a four-way stop, the vehicle with the largest tires always has the right of way. Never tow another car using panty hose and duct tape. When sending your wife down the road with a gas can, it is impolite to ask her to bring back beer. Do not lay rubber while traveling in a funeral procession.- Redneck Driving Etiquette - * Dim your headlights for approaching vehicles, even if the gun is loaded and the deer is in sight.* When approaching a four-way stop, the vehicle with the largest tires always has the right of way.*Never tow another car using pantyhose and duct tape.*When sending your wife down the road with a gas can, it is impolite to ask her to bring back beer.

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