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But for now, consider her as someone who is unavailable until further notice, and don’t try to rush back into a relationship that so recently ended in such a catastrophic fashion.
Since then I’ve met a wonderful woman, and we’re currently seeing one another.
I recently received an email response to the ad, which I’d forgotten to take down—a mistake I have now fixed. I responded saying I was sorry, but I am certainly too old for her and wished her luck finding someone her own age. Most of me wants to get as far away from the situation as possible, but I have a lingering concern that I might want to let her parents know that she’d been messaging older men on the internet.
Part of navigating adult life is figuring out what things you are and aren’t willing to live with.
If you decide you want to keep your fantastic boyfriend and also have the chance to go on a Sexual Walkabout, you will have to ask for it, and, even if he says yes, spend a lot of time discussing boundaries and hard noes and feelings. He might also be hurt by the fact that you asked for it at all, because he’s his own, separate person.
I know I’d like to know that about my child at that age, but I also know that everyone’s situation is different. with (purported) 14-year-olds on the internet, not more.
There was no reason for you to reply to that message in the first place, since posting an ad doesn’t create an obligation on your part to reply to every single inquiry.
You can ask him for an unfair, one-sided hall pass to sexually experiment while staying together, which he may or may not go for.
You don’t to contemplate an entirely quid-pro-quo arrangement.
You can stay in what sounds like a pretty happy, monogamous relationship with your wonderful boyfriend, eventually marry him, and periodically wish you’d had the chance to sleep with more people before you two met.
You can break up with him and lose the great relationship, but spend as much time as you like gaining sexual experience with as many women and men as you fancy.